New Practitioner Faces His Fundamental Attachments

(Minghui.org) I saw Shen Yun when I was in college—I was alarmed by the persecution but delighted by the artists’ performances. I wondered how something so terrible as the persecution could exist in the world and what I would have done if I were in China.

I was studying for a degree in music so I was impressed by the orchestra and the dancers. I wanted to have a successful music career, and I wished to make my parents proud. Before I began practicing Falun Dafa I was attached to my sense of worth and my success. Since I started practicing, even though I still perform music, my perspective is very different.

I felt wonderful when I did the exercises, but a few days later I had some tribulations and I dreamed I was falling from the clouds. I felt confused and didn’t do the exercises for several months. But I knew the opportunity to practice Falun Dafa was precious.

I was protected when I was rear-ended in a serious high-speed accident on the highway. I was distracted after I dropped someone off at the airport, and I thought about our conversation on the way there. I was also exhausted from lack of sleep because I studied for exams.

I Look to Look Inward

I resumed practicing when I moved back to my mom’s house after college. There was a lot of tension between us, because she wanted me to move out. But the tension was actually my own attachment to fear of what my family thought of me, and how much I wanted them to support me.

Because I couldn’t earn enough money to move into my own place, I felt dejected. I felt like I needed to get my privacy back and I was infringing on hers. But I remembered every situation is an opportunity for spiritual growth, so I felt there were deeper issues that needed to be resolved.

I often blamed her instead of examining myself—perhaps because I didn’t want to. Master’s teaching helped me calm down listen with an open heart. Master said: “We say that when you take a step back in a conflict, you will find the seas and the skies boundless, and it will certainly be a different situation.” (Zhuan Falun)

My mother and I now have a peaceful relationship again. I’m more truthful, more responsible for myself, and a kinder son. I feel my cultivation greatly improved but I know I have much further to go.

Cultivation helped me identify and confront many of my deepest fears which went unresolved for so many years. I’ve learned how to look within when having conflicts with others, how to hear my heart, and to be more tolerant and truthful. I’m grateful for Master’s compassion and I’ll do the three things well.