(Minghui.org) As I wrote down my journey of cultivation over the past few years, my heart was full of appreciation for Master. It was compassionate and great Master who supported me with great dedication and endurance. Only because of his support was I able to walk this path through today.
Treating All Ordeals as Good Things That Increase Gong
During the night of April 29, 2017, a sharp pain suddenly attacked me and woke me. It felt like two huge hands, like steel pliers, were sticking into the left side of my body and strangling me tightly. I almost suffocated due to the pain. My upper body was all sweaty and wet. The pain was unspeakable. Sometimes it hurt here, sometimes it hurt there. On the front and back of the left half of my body, many pink pussy blisters appeared of different sizes. The big ones were like broad beans and the small ones like soybeans. These blisters looked bright in color, and disgusting.
Nothing that happens to a cultivator is a coincidence. Master said:
“Those ordeals and the suffering, no matter how great or harsh you find them to be, are good things, because they take place solely on account of your cultivation. A person can eliminate karma and shed human attachments when he goes through ordeals, and through ordeals he can improve.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2008 New York Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teaching, Vol. VIII)
I started to look inward and found a lot of attachments and notions. I sent forth righteous thoughts for the whole night. But there was not much change in my body. It was painful when I sent forth righteous thoughts. It hurt even worse when I stopped sending forth righteous thoughts. I knew that the pain was caused by my karma, which had accumulated in multiple previous lives, and I probably had hurt too many lives in my previous lives. Now they wanted me to pay them back with my life. But I had no fear. Master said:
“Master is here, and the Fa is here, so nothing will get out of hand.” (On the Responses to the Piece About Assistant Souls, team yellow translation)
During that period, I had solid belief in Master and the Fa. I told myself to believe that Master arranges the best for me. As a Dafa disciple, I should speak and behave like a Dafa disciple. I thought that if all these illusions were caused by demons, I would eliminate them; if they were caused by karma, I would pay it back; if they were arranged by the old forces, I would deny them with righteous thoughts. I had one thought: all of these manifestations were good things, and my gong and level was increasing.
I didn’t tell fellow practitioners about my situation, because they were all busy. I went to the group Fa study every day. None of them knew that I was going through an ordeal. I knew that Master had removed a lot of bad stuff from me and had endured a lot for me. I could not express my appreciation with words. I often had tears when I thought of Master’s salvation.
The interference from the illusion gave me tremendous stress. I felt that I was about to die at every moment. For a long period of time, I did the three things with this stress. In my dreams, I often saw things related to funerals and death.
One day in the spring of 2018, I went to pick up my grandson from school. On a bridge I saw a big tomb-house. How could a tomb-house be built on a bridge? It was an illusion. I told myself: “It is all fake. I am a Dafa disciple. I cannot be interfered with by these illusions.” I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it. The bad stuff often tried to enter my mind, even when I was doing the three things. I thought: “These are not my thoughts. If you enter my mind, you will die. I will eliminate you.” I kept my heart unmoved, no matter what I saw or heard. I always reminded myself:
“I’m Li Hongzhi’s disciple, I don’t want other arrangements or acknowledge them”—then they won’t dare to do that. So it can all be resolved.” (Teaching Given on Lantern Festival Day, 2003)
I knelt down in front of Master’s portrait several times. I said to Master: “Master, I am your disciple. My respect for you and the Fa, and my belief in you and the Fa, will never change. I will follow you and complete my journey of cultivation that is arranged by you. My will for cultivation will never shake.”
Many people around me knew that I practiced Falun Gong. I told myself that I should not ruin the reputation of Dafa or give people a negative impression of Dafa. Master cherishes his disciples and has done so much for me. Several times, I felt that I reached my limit for tolerating the pain, and I thought about asking fellow practitioners whose celestial eyes are open to have a look at my situation. But I always dismissed such thoughts immediately. I only trust Master.
At the beginning, because of the pain, I could not straighten my back and had difficulty breathing and walking. I didn’t have an appetite. I once went six days without food or water. I was constipated for nine days and had a hard time urinating. I could only lie on my back in bed and was not able to roll onto my side. I sweat a lot during sleep. For a period of time, I felt that there was something heavy pressing down on my heart and stomach. I could not eat and always felt like vomiting. I had great pains in my ribs, ringing in my ears, and dizziness.
What was strange was that the pain stopped as soon as I lay down, even when I took a short nap. But it started right away when I got up. The pain lasted from the morning exercises at 3:40 a.m. to righteous thoughts at night at 12 a.m. But I tried not to let it interfere with me. I always got up at 3:40 a.m. for the exercises. The old forces tried to use the pain to weaken my will and interfere with me doing the three things, but I denied their arrangements.
I maintained righteous thoughts and a clear mind at every moment. I didn't dare to slack off and kept all of my thoughts on the Fa. I knew that if I started to slack off, I might walk the path arranged by the old forces and would crash. The old forces didn't want me to eat or do the three things, so I forced myself to eat and do the three things more wholeheartedly. I only followed Master. The old forces tried to kill me, and if it wasn't for Master's protection they may have succeeded.
Due to Master's help, amazingly I was able to smile at everybody, no matter how much pain I had or how hungry I was. Even when I felt dizzy, I was able to keep a clear mind and an energetic body. I did everything I should do, including carrying heavy stuff and sending forth righteous thoughts for fellow practitioners who suffered from sickness karma.
Master encouraged me through other people. My neighbor often said to others: “She is so energetic.” My friends told me: “You look younger than your age.” A fellow practitioner told me: “Your skin looks so good, pink and smooth. You look so young.” I said to her: “This is because my gong and level are improving.”
No matter how painful I felt, I studied the Fa, memorized the Fa, sent forth righteous thoughts, and looked inward every day. I joined the group Fa-study every day, although I lived far away from the Fa study site. Before Fa-study, I recited paragraphs from Zhuan Falun without any errors. I used to sit in double-lotus for 30 or 40 minutes when reading the Fa. During this period, I tried to sit in that position for an hour. I never missed sending forth righteous thoughts at the four assigned times. I also joined the local 30-minute times for sending forth righteous thoughts. I got up at 3:40 a.m. and did the five sets of exercises every day. At 10:50 p.m. I did the second exercise for one hour and then started to send forth righteous thoughts at 12 a.m. I read the Minghui website and clarified the truth to everybody that I ran into.
I never considered this experience a tribulation. From the beginning I told myself that was illusion, including the pain, interference, and xinxing tests. Looking back now, all of these were nothing. Master said that all of the ordeals are good things, and they are a sign of gong increasing.
Saving Predestined People
In June 2017, my neighbors, an elderly lady and her granddaughter, were about to move away. I told myself not to miss this chance, and no matter how painful my body was, I needed to save them.
I visited them to clarify the truth. The little girl quit the communist young pioneers, and the old lady agreed to chant “Falun Dafa is good.” The girl showed me her textbook that contained the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) propaganda attacking Falun Gong. She asked me for the truth. I then broke the lies apart one-by-one, such as the staged self-immolation on Tiananmen Square. After I was done, the girl happily patted her head and said: “Now I know everything.” Since then she has always greeted me warmly.
In November 2018, an old friend told me on the phone that he was coming to my town for a conference. I knew that it was Master's arrangement, and I could not miss it. I had tried to clarify the truth to him years ago. He was a government official, and I didn't have enough time, so I could not clarify the truth to him thoroughly. Now Master had given me another chance.
I visited him at his hotel. I told him that I am a Falun Gong practitioner. He didn't say anything at the beginning, then he said that he often saw Falun Gong materials on his trips overseas. I asked if he had read any of the materials to gain a good understanding of Falun Gong. He only said, “That is your belief,” then changed the subject.
His schedule was very tight, and he had no time to have dinner with me. The second day, I bought some local produce and called him. He really had no time to meet with me. I told myself not to miss the chance, “I must talk to him today, because he will leave tomorrow.” I asked Master for help. I called him several times, and he finally agreed to give me a few minutes before his dinner conference.
I met him in the hotel lobby and talked to him. He didn't say anything, just looked at me with a smile. I said a lot, he then asked: “They don't police Falun Gong in this town?” He meant: “How do you dare to talk about Falun Gong in broad daylight.” Time was limited, and his dinner time was approaching. Since he still had not expressed his attitude about Falun Gong, I told myself that this was the only chance for him to be saved. I developed compassion and was determined to convince him to quit the CCP.
I said to him sincerely: “Do you know that I always regretted that I didn't really tell you the truth the last time I saw you in 2013. I often blamed myself. It would be a tragedy that could not be made up for if you miss the chance to be saved due to my fear. This time, let me help you to quit the evil Party. It will bring you a bright and happy future. You can quit it using a pseudonym.” He said happily: “Good, good.” It turned out that he was afraid of using his real name, even though he actually knew the truth and was willing to quit. I said: “Next time you go abroad, you must read the Falun Gong materials. You need to remember that Falun Dafa is good, and Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.” He said: “Right, right.” With Master's help, a life was saved.
The next day, he called me from the train as he was heading back home. He thanked me for telling him the truth. I said in my heart: “You should thank my Master. Master made the arrangement so that I had time to talk to you. If I missed the chance, I would not have the chance again.” I could tell that his happiness came from his heart after being saved.
In May 2019, an old childhood friend came to my town for her grandnephew's wedding with her brother and sister-in-law. When she called me, the wedding was already over, and they were leaving at 8 p.m. that night. I knew that her brother's family came here to learn the truth, so I went to the place where they were staying, her sister-in-law's apartment, but her brother's family was not back. I waited until 6 p.m., then went home to send forth righteous thoughts. After sending righteous thoughts, I told myself not to miss the chance, so I went there again with two roast chickens that are our special local products.
I felt my body was very heavy while climbing the stairs in the apartment building. I could not raise my legs. It was interference from other dimensions. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it. I had a hard time breathing when I reached the fourth floor. After a short break, her family came out the door. They were going to the train station. If I was a few minutes later, I would have missed the chance. They were surprised to see me.
I got straight to the subject. I told her brother's family that I had come for them, because they haven't quit the Party yet. Her brother said that his wife is a Christian. I said: “Jesus is also a divine being. Falun Dafa is the Buddha Fa. These two beliefs do not interfere with each other. The CCP is atheist. Only by quitting it, can you really follow Jesus's teachings.” My friend said: “You guys should quit. I have already quit.” The couple happily agreed. I felt relaxed watching them leaving for the train station.
Looking back at my journey of cultivation over the last few years, I have solidly passed tests with Master's benevolent protection and help. I have followed Master's teachings and kept every thought of mine on the Fa at every single second. I have eliminated karma, purified my body, and improved my xinxing, my gong, and my level. Everything is given by Master. His compassion is tremendous. I thank him again.
The Fa-rectification period is about to end, and the evil will be completely eliminated soon. I must follow Master and finish the rest of my cultivation journey.
