(Minghui.org) I dreamed of becoming a strong capable woman as a little girl, devoting my life to my career and pursuing fame and money. It was difficult to let go of these notions after I practiced Falun Dafa.
Before I started cultivating Falun Dafa, I was unhappy, exhausted and moody, because I worried about grades and relationships daily.
On my cultivation path, I learned that the purpose of life is not to pursue fame and money, but to return to one's original self. Cultivation changed me into a peaceful and happy person who takes fame and money lightly.
My dream was to be a diplomat, which required to sit for several examinations. However, I did not pass after trying to take the exam three times. Then, I realized that a cultivator's life is arranged by Master, so I gave up the attachment to be a career diplomat.
I again took and passed the test one month after I gave up my dream, passed the test, and learned that the passing rate was five percent.
A World's Top 500 company offered me a management job, which turned out to be interesting and not stressful. I could set up my work schedule, which gave me time for Falun Dafa projects.
One year into this job, I encountered a xinxing test. My supervisor turned against me, ignored me, and told co-workers that he would not recommend me for a promotion.
When I was not promoted my heart was heavy, although I knew it to be a chance to improve my xinxing, so it was a good thing. But, when my heart was full of everyday people's notions, I felt deep pain.
Master said:
“As practitioners, you will suddenly come across conflicts. What should you do? You should always maintain a heart of compassion and kindness. Then, when you run into a problem, you will be able to do well because it gives you room to buffer the confrontation. You should always be benevolent and kind to others, and consider others when doing anything. Whenever you encounter a problem, you should first consider whether others can put up with this matter or if it will hurt anyone. In doing so, there will not be any problems. Therefore, in cultivation practice you should follow a higher and higher standard for yourself.” (Zhuan Falun)
I looked within to find the attachment that brought on this xinxing test. I found that my attitude towards work was not right. I did as little as possible and did not care about the quality of my work. This insight opened my eyes and I changed my work habits, improved my relationship with my supervisor, coworkers, and clients.
Recalling the past showed me that my supervisor's shortcomings were a reflection of my character. We both are stubborn, self-centered, and judgmental.
Master hints through others our shortcomings. Getting rid of them is solid cultivation.
My notions make me uncomfortable when dealing with people. When working on a Dafa project, fellow practitioners made some changes, which improved the video, but still had some flaws.
This action made me angry. But, after I calmed down, I realized that although it still needed some work, the changes were good.
I looked inward, and felt ashamed. My first response to any changes was objection, instead of harmonizing the issue under discussion.
Master said,
“When another God proposes an idea, they aren't eager to reject it, and they aren't eager to express their own ideas and they don't believe that their own ideas are good. Instead, they look at what the end result of the other God's proposed approach will be. The paths are different--everyone's path is different--and the truths that beings validate and enlighten to in the Fa are different, too, but the results might very well be the same. That's why they look at the results, and if the result of a God's idea can achieve the goal, if it can truly achieve it, then all of them will go along with it. That's how Gods think. Also, if there's something lacking in it they'll unconditionally and quietly supplement it to make things more complete and perfect. That's how they handle things.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A.” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference II)
When I tried to defend my notions, I prioritized myself and not the Fa. When the situation disagreed with my everyday people's notions, I got mad and became jealous. Instead of assimilating into the Fa, I reverted to human notions.
It is truly solid cultivation if I can find my everyday people's notions, and suppress and get rid off them. If I can forbear and have the strong will to endure the pain when these notions resist, then Master will help me remove the black substance. Then, I am able to improve and assimilate into the Fa.
If I fail to let go of my notions, I will be unable to do the three things well.
Going forward, I will do everything based on my current understanding of the Fa and keep chipping away at my notions.
When one holds onto ones notions, and treats them as the universal truth, he or she has already set him or herself above the Fa, and it is a sign of “demonic interference from one's own mind.”