(Minghui.org) I was near retirement when I started practicing Falun Dafa at age 49. People perceived me as quite successful because I had a good career, a perfect marriage, and a complete family.
Yet I was puzzled by some aspects of my life. Although I had been living up to expectations, I had experienced many illnesses since a young age. For example, I had cancer at age 42 and underwent two surgeries, which left me with four, 8-inch-long scars.
I was also nearsighted and had astigmatism. Due to my high blood pressure, I lost complete sight in my left eye, and my right eye had severe myopia. I lived life relying on my right eye.
Before practicing Falun Dafa, I smoked and drank alcohol despite my poor health, and considered it normal. I also thought it was normal to fight back when treated unfairly, and that retaliation was the way to get even. I was selfish, self-centered, and often told lies.
After I obtained the Fa, I came to understand what Master said,
“As practitioners, in the course of cultivation there are so many attachments to be relinquished, such as the mentality of showing off, jealousy, the competitive mentality, and zealotry. Many different attachments must be discarded, for the loss we discuss is one in a broad sense. During the entire course of cultivation, we should lose all everyday people’s attachments and various desires.” (Zhuan Falun)
When I first started to practice Falun Dafa, I thought, “How would I have any attachments? I'm pretty good... OK, I might have a few. But since Master said we should remove them, I will remove them all tomorrow! I don't have many to begin with, so it will be so easy to remove all of them.”
Well, I have practiced cultivation for 12 years now, and the more I have cultivated, the more attachments I have discovered in myself, and they are very hard to remove. Often, when I felt that I had removed an attachment, it soon resurfaced. When I removed others, I found more hidden attachments.
Master said,
“For example, if a bottle filled with dirty things is sealed tightly and thrown into water, it will sink all the way to the bottom. You pour out some of its dirty contents. The more you empty the bottle, the higher it will float in the water. If it is emptied entirely, it will float on the surface completely. In the course of our cultivation practice, you must clean out various bad things in your body so that you can move up.” (Zhuan Falun)
Through studying the Falun Dafa teachings, I have not only discovered that I had all kinds of attachments, but I also came to understand the principle of karmic retribution, and why I had so many illnesses during my life.
When I first started practicing, my husband tended to ridicule and swear at me.
Then after about a year and a half, his attitude changed completely, and he started to support my working on Dafa projects. He bought me supplies and helped with loading the truck and setting up the “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance International Art Exhibition.” He also extended great hospitality to the practitioners who visited our home.
I realized that this was because of help from Master's Fashen (Law Body). Master said,
“When those who truly practice cultivation on their own read this Dafa, I will clean out their bodies as well. In addition, your home environment must also be cleaned.” (Zhuan Falun)
I have benefited from Falun Dafa so much, including my health, and my harmonious family. In the past, I was surrounded by hardships and didn't know what a life free of trouble would be like. I now live in peace, harmony, and respect, and I care about others. Dafa has given me so much!
I have sometimes felt that I wasn't worthy of Dafa because I had committed so many sins, and I lacked the mighty virtue that Falun Dafa practitioners display. I asked myself, “Are you worthy of the title of 'Dafa Disciple' while having so many sins?” I pondered and identified many bad thoughts and behaviors of mine, and realized that I was doing poorly in cultivation practice.
I told myself one day, “If you have realized that you're unworthy of Dafa, then you should fulfill your prehistoric vows to Master, assist Master in Fa-rectification, and save sentient beings. The sentient beings are waiting for you.”
You should step out to do truth-clarification, participate in as many Dafa projects as possible, maintain righteous thoughts, and save those sentient beings that have been waiting for you. Only by doing these things can you assimilate to Dafa.”
I subsequently strove to help out in truth-clarification projects, including the “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance International Art Exhibition,” the movie “Free China,” and promotion of Shen Yun performances in Mexico and the U.S.
One day I received an email from a Belgian practitioner asking me to teach the Falun Dafa exercises in Guatemala. I had a few friends in Guatemala, so I decided to go.
When I reached the Mexico/ Guatemala border, several motorcycle taxi drivers grabbed my luggage and put them on their bikes. One of them said I was not allowed to enter Guatemala on foot and told me to get on his bike. He drove very fast, ignoring my constant requests to let me get off. He drove six blocks to an ATM and told me to take out money.
I was shocked and didn't know what to do. Two more men arrived, and the first man said to them, “She doesn't want to take the money out.” The two men threatened me, “You'd better take out the money as we said. Forget about asking for help. No one here will help you. We are bigger than cops here. Take the money out now and come with us.”
I was terrified by their threats and menacing faces. When I was about to take out my credit card, a black car stopped, and a tall man stepped out. He sternly questioned the three men about what they were doing. They hastily replied, “We are working, Boss.” The man ordered them to put my luggage in his car, and they complied.
The man then asked me to get in his car. I was shaking when he started the engine, not knowing where he was taking me, and what he planned to do to me. The man took a glance at me from the rearview mirror and said gently, “Don't worry. I will take you to wherever you need to go.” I thought he must be a taxi driver. He continued, “What you came here to do is good,” and asked me where I wanted to go.
In a trembling voice, I told him I came here to teach Falun Dafa meditation exercises but forgot the specific address. All I could remember was that the location was near the El Carmen Border.
He told me that I was at the wrong border, and that the El Carmen Border was over an hour away. He suggested that I call the people who were waiting for me. I took out my phone only to find that it was locked.
I told him my phone had stopped working. He lent me his phone and helped make the call. He told the person on the other end that we were at a different border and that we would arrive in an hour. He told me not to worry, and that he would not harm me.
He asked me about the “heart-mind” nature of Falun Dafa. I wondered, “How does he know Falun Dafa is a cultivation practice?” But I didn't ask him. I just started introducing the practice to him.
An hour's drive felt like 15 minutes. When we arrived at the El Carmen border, the man asked me if I had spotted the people I wanted to see. I said, “Yes,” but in reality I didn't know where they were because I had only seen them in pictures.
I got out of the car and walked into the crowd. A moment later, the group of people spotted me and yelled out my name from across the street. At that moment, I felt as if I was coming back to life.
They crossed the street and hugged me. I thanked them for waiting. They asked me how I got there and where my taxi was. I turned around and saw that my luggage had been placed on the ground and that the black car was nowhere to be seen.
I said, “The car was right here. It was a black taxi.” They told me that there were no black taxi services in Guatemala. I was stunned. I asked them if they saw the black car just then. They said they only saw me standing next to my luggage, but there was no black car.
Master taught us,
“What is owed must be paid for. Therefore, some dangerous things may occur in the course of cultivation practice. When these things take place, however, you will not be scared, and neither will real danger be allowed to happen to you.” (Zhuan Falun)
Master also said,
“My fashen will protect you until you are able to protect yourself.” (Zhuan Falun)
Master also said,
“I am rooted in the universe. If anyone can harm you, he or she would be able to harm me. Put simply, that person would be able to harm this universe.” (Zhuan Falun)
I wondered, who was the driver of the black car? Why did the robbers call him boss? I'm not sure. But what I am sure of is that Master protected me from harm.
This concludes my personal understanding. Please kindly point out anything improper.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2017 Mexico Fa Conference)