(Minghui.org) Looking back on my over twenty years of cultivation in Falun Dafa, I have realized that I have only been skimming the surface. Although I do the three things every day, I know that my cultivation is not solid, even though it may appear otherwise.
Compassionate Master doesn't want to leave me behind and gave hints to me, to let me know my shortcomings.
I remember some cultivation stories from Buddhists, Daoists and Christians that I used to read about, but this knowledge actually interfered with my own cultivation in Dafa. I thought that my cultivation should resemble their paths.
I used human notions formed from my knowledge of other schools of cultivation to lead my path in Dafa, but it didn't comply with the requirements of Dafa. Because of this, I only touched upon the surface of Dafa cultivation.
For example, on the issue of the relationship between couples, many practitioners, including me, thought that we should sever all lustful desire upon taking up cultivation.
I therefore decided to sleep separately from my spouse, which resulted in major misunderstandings.
Cultivation is a gradual process to get rid of our desires and attachments to meet the standard of the Fa. When we truly pay attention to cultivating our xinxing, we will reach the required cultivation state and the relationship between our spouses will be a non-issue. Just like Master said:
“The other day I said that the Buddha-light illuminates everywhere and rectifies all abnormalities. In other words, the energy scattered from our bodies can rectify all abnormal conditions. Therefore, under the effects of this field, if you do not think about these things, you will unintentionally restrain your spouse as well.”
My daughter, who is also a Falun Dafa practitioner, complained about me one day. She said that she didn't feel like I was her mother.
I had been treating my daughter like a fellow practitioner for a long time, and not a daughter. I believed that this was a good cultivation state, not to be affected by human sentiment. This was because I didn't understand the Fa well. In fact, Master has addressed this issue:
“In practicing cultivation in ordinary human society, we should respect parents and educate our children. Under all circumstances, we must be good and kind to others, not to mention to our family members. We should treat everyone in the same way. We must be good to our parents and children and be considerate of others in all respects. Such a heart is thus unselfish, and it is a heart of kindness and benevolence.”
I also realized that my understanding on how to let go of sentiment was wrong. I wasn't close to my sisters, and thought that the lighter I took the relationship, the better my cultivation, as I wouldn't be interfered with by them. I knew we needed to come out of human sentimentality in cultivation, and I forcibly cut it off.
This was because of my own selfishness, as I didn't want myself to fall into the attachment of sentiment. I purposely created such an environment for my own protection in cultivation.
It was like I arranged my own cultivation path. I didn't do things according to the requirements of the Fa to improve my xinxing, and reach the cultivation realm that Master requires.
Master said in the Eastern U.S. Fa Conference:
“Don’t force yourself: “Deep inside I do love, I do love my family members, but I’ll force myself to stop loving them.” That would be wrong, because your realm hasn’t risen and you’re only trying to do it forcibly. If you do that, it will actually cause people to misunderstand Dafa, and damage the image of Dafa. As love is diminished in your cultivation, it will be replaced by the compassion (cibei) that emerges.” (Teaching the Fa at the Eastern U.S. Fa Conference)
My understanding is that we shouldn't add our human thinking into the Fa, and we need to let go of all our human notions and do things according to the Fa. This is the only way to improve ourselves to meet the standard of the Fa.
Category: Improving Oneself
