(Clearwisdom.net) While talking with a practitioner one day, I found out that she is on the verge of a divorce because her husband is not happy with their sex life. He constantly complained about it and has also asked for a divorce several times. Thinking it was strange, I asked her about it and found out that she tried to avoid a sex life. Another practitioner who works at the same place with her also shared the same issue, but neither of them knew what the problem was. I would like to share some of my personal experience regarding this matter.
From the perspective of the Fa, we know that when conflicts occur, we should first search inside ourselves. Whenever there is interference, it means that we must have done something wrong. As Master says,
"With your ever-increasing gong potency, the energy scattered from the gong in your body will also be quite powerful. Even if it is not that powerful, an everyday person within your field will still be restrained. Or if you are at home, you will also restrain others, and your family members may be restrained by you. Why is this so? You do not even have to use your mind to do this. This field is one of pure harmony, compassion, and right faith. Therefore, people are unlikely to think of bad things or commit bad deeds. It can have this effect." (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun, March 2000 translation version)
This tells us that when our minds are pure, without desire for lust, our field will be free of this kind of bad substance. Then our energy field will restrict the people around us, therefore, our spouses will probably forget about it.
However, if our spouses still cannot forget about it, we should throughly search inside ourselves: do we still have some desire that is deeply hidden, still have thoughts about it? We should not look outward and try to avoid this issue. We should let it go naturally, instead of forcing ourselves to have restraint and creating unnecessary tribulations for our life. Forcing ourselves to have restraint is not true improvement. Genuine understanding from our heart is true elevation for us. Nevertheless, we should use this issue to search inside ourselves, cultivate ourselves, and quickly improve ourselves. If we can do well, we will gradually be able to solve the issues at home. In addition, we should also use this opportunity to purify ourselves, so as to reach the level of the teaching, "the Buddha-light illuminates everywhere and rectifies all abnormalities."
Failing to search inside ourselves means that we are unwilling to let go of our attachments, and at the same time, we are indulging ourselves and not being very responsible for ourselves. I remember one day when I read an article on line at work that was about a sentimental story. I was moved by it, and did not realize that I should have eliminated that thought. As a result, my husband had the same desire that night. While brushing my teeth, I started to eliminate the lust substances in both mine and my husband's field. When I was ready to go to bed, I found that my husband was already sound asleep and snoring. While clearing the bad substances in my field, everything else was harmonized as well. The next morning, everything was normal, and my husband was fine. It had happened to me many times that if I did not have the desire, my husband would not think about it either. However, whenever I encountered interference and had this desire, my husband definitely thought of this and had the desire as well. From this experience, I learned that all of the interference is caused by ourselves.
Of course, our social environment also plays certain interference, especially between cultivators and non-cultivators. I believe that as long as our thoughts are pure, and we have righteous thoughts, nothing can block us. Therefore, we should try not to give ordinary people a wrong impression that Falun Gong practitioners have all turned into quasi-monks because of our own failure to do well. This impression is actually damaging Dafa. How different practitioners treat this issue is a demonstration of different levels.
I hope this article will help fellow practitioners who have also struggled with this issue.
