(Clearwisdom.net) Seeing that some fellow practitioners are still unable to pass through sickness karma tribulations, being unable to fundamentally change one's notions, I have decided to share my experiences of passing through several sickness tribulations. Please feel free to point out any inadequacies.
Master taught us that
"a cultivator must look at things as a cultivator should and with the mind of a cultivator, and absolutely cannot look at things with the mind of an ordinary person. Nothing you encounter is simple, accidental, or an ordinary thing. It must have to do with your cultivation and your improvement. Because you are a cultivator, your life path has been changed, and you have been given a new cultivation path; nothing on your path happens by chance. But it will definitely appear to be by chance, because only in this delusion and in a state where you are the same as ordinary people can you show whether you are cultivating, whether you cultivate well, and whether you are able to pass test after test. That is cultivation, and that is righteous enlightenment!" ("Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles")
Our compassionate Master has told us, time and time again in "Zhuan Falun" as well as other lectures, how to face sickness karma tribulations in the process of our cultivation. As long as we study the Fa well, learn it in depth, bear hardships and cultivate solidly, believe in Master and the Fa, do the Three Things well, we will be able to get through it.
Since I started cultivation in 1996, almost every single day, I have never forgotten to study the Fa. I have repeatedly read all of Master's lectures and teachings, as well as listened to Master's lectures in Jinan, etc. I have constantly taken the Fa as teacher, cultivated myself solidly, followed Master's Fa-rectification closely, and passed numerous tests and tribulations. Even though I had to go through many sickness tribulations, I was able to go through them well with righteous thoughts.
However, I walked a wrong path in the tribulation I faced in 2004. During the Mid Autumn Festival, I developed a fever of over 40 degrees Celsius. It lasted for a week. When I sent forth righteous thoughts during this period, I could see the top of my gong pillar capped by something like an umbrella. When I sent forth righteous thoughts, I saw an unkempt old man dressed in white clothes trapped inside a machine and suffering in pain with each stretch and compression. I lifted my palm in front of me, and I saw another burly man dressed in white inside a beautiful pavilion running around not knowing what to do. (Even though I cultivate with my abilities closed, I am still able to see some things once in a while.) I knew that this was the evil minions of the old forces persecuting me and hence strengthened my sending forth righteous thoughts.
About a month later, I developed symptoms of cirrhosis and other abdominal problems, my legs became swollen, and large swollen areas developed over my entire body. I could barely bear the pain when I ate and slept. (I had had Hepatitis B before I began cultivation.) Yet I still felt energetic inside. Under constant persuasion by my family, my will wavered and my xinxing lowered. I was hospitalized for four days. However, I felt very uncomfortable in the hospital. I realized that it was not good and asked to be released.
Master told us in Zhuan Falun that,
"You're a practitioner, so if you always think it's a health problem you're actually asking for it--you are asking for that problem, and now it's able to set in."
As my xinxing was lowered, I had to get injections for a short period of time after I returned home for proteins and also took drugs. I always felt like vomiting when I ate and felt drained of energy. I became emaciated and was very thin. Health checkups revealed that my liver had shrunk, protein levels were low, and other diabetic problems also went from bad to worse after the treatment.
During this period of time I began studying the "Fa," practicing the exercises and sending forth righteous thoughts conscientiously. When the evil minions of the old forces caused me headaches when I sent forth righteous thoughts, I would strengthen my righteous thoughts and persist. I told my relatives that I didn't need any more needles and would not agree to anything that my relatives or my brother (who is a doctor) said. I explained to them umpteen times that practitioners do not have any sicknesses. They did not understand me and I even began to seriously consider leaving home. When my brother gave me injections, he would feel as sick as I; when my other relatives gave me with the shots, their arms or hands would also feel a lot of pain. I used this to explain to them that it was a sign that they should not be giving me any more injections. I told them that their arms would feel more pain if they tried to do it again, however, they were only half-convinced and would not believe me.
As I have never stopped studying the Fa, I realized that I have not done what a cultivator should do. I was fooled by this false image, and I did not think righteously. I knew I could not take any more needles. Then, I made up my mind: I will have no more drugs or therapies or needles, no matter whether my liver is big or small, no matter if I have diabetes or bleeding, etc.
Having decided not to go for any treatment, I thought as I went to sleep at night, "If I've ever made any deals with the old forces, I will not accept them at all and I sever all previous relations with the old forces entirely. I shall follow Master's path of Fa-rectification and save sentient beings." Instantly, everything turned bright, as if it were day, and I saw a package fly to the small table beside my bed. I realized that this was Master's enlightening, asking me to put down my mental burden and attachments. Besides studying the Fa conscientiously, practicing the exercises, and sending forth righteous thoughts, I continued to give out truth-clarification flyers on the streets despite my bad health. Once my xinxing increased, my spirits were raised, and I could write truth clarification materials whenever I ran out. Moreover, I could clarify the truth to everyone who came to visit me and give them Dafa amulets. Under Master's protection, my health improved day by day, and soon after all the problems disappeared. The people around me were stunned, as they all knew that I had been very sick. A few practitioners who came to encourage me also stopped worrying about me, and the doctors were able to see the magnificence of Dafa.
Thinking about the wrong path I have walked, I realized that if I had not studied the Fa well, if I had not used a cultivator's perspective to regard problems, and if I had not had righteous thoughts, it would have been terribly dangerous!
Another night in the summer of 2006, while I was alone at home, my nose began bleeding profusely. I tried using cold water to wash it and paper towels to block it but it just would not stop. Soon, the entire bathroom floor was stained with blood. "What's happening?" I thought. I realized immediately that it was the old forces persecuting me. I sat in the lotus position and began sending forth righteous thoughts. The blood flowed down my nose and dyed my white pants red. In about a minute or two, the bleeding stopped.
Through studying the Fa and cultivating diligently, I realized very strongly that as long as we follow Master's Fa to cultivate ourselves diligently and regard ourselves as a true practitioners, we will be able to pass every test and tribulation that comes along. If we have a single wrong thought, however, we will fall down. Matter and thought are one, our gong can only be as high as our xinxing, the restriction that the universe puts on you depends on your xinxing, so once your xinxing improves, there will be material changes to your body. Master tells us near the end of Zhuan Falun,
"It's hard to endure, but you can endure it. It's hard to do, but you can do it."
"When you're going through an awful tribulation, or maybe a critical juncture, give it a try. When it's hard to endure, try to endure it. When it seems impossible to do, or just hard to do, give it a try and see just what you can do. And when you can really do it, just like that worn and weary traveler, you'll see, "the shade of willows, the blooms of flowers, a place to rest my head"!"
It is really so. No matter what you face, when you put down your attachments and follow Master's Fa, the test will seem very easy once you pass it.
Fellow practitioners, having cultivated to this moment, let us join hands, form a united whole, do the "Three Things" well, and together work diligently in cultivation.
To end I would like to share Master's poem "Severing" from Hong Yin II:
Severing
(in Yuan verse)
Cultivation is not hard,
It's attachments that are hard to part with.
When will you sever those many attachments?
All know the sea of hardship has no shore.
If your will is not firm,
The hurdles are like mountains.
How will you transcend this mortal life?January 1, 2004