(Clearwisdom.net) After studying Teacher's new article "The Closer to the End, the More Diligent You Should Be," I remembered a story the Teacher told in "Teaching the Fa at the Houston Fa Conference" in 1996.
"A long time ago in India, a disciple of Brahmanism was a cultivator. He was quite diligent, cultivating by himself in the mountains. One day a hunter was chasing a deer and injured it with an arrow. The deer went near the cultivator, who hid and protected the deer. The cultivator was very lonely, being all by himself in the mountains, and he decided to raise the deer. However, for humans, if they don't pay attention, their attachments can be quite intense. The [cultivator's] ordinary people's feeling of sympathy and the heart's attachment to qing were all poured out for the deer. Later, he grew very attached to this deer. In the end, the deer had even become his closest companion. He put a lot of energy on the deer. When he meditated, his mind wasn't calm, as he was thinking about what to feed the deer. He slacked off on being diligent.
"Several years passed, and one day, the deer suddenly died. He was in a lot of pain. He constantly thought about the deer, which made it even more difficult for him to be diligent. He was quite elderly by then. If you're not a cultivator, your life cannot be extended. Since he was no longer able to cultivate, his life would come to an end. Even at the end of his life, he did not think about his Buddhist principles. Instead, he was thinking about the deer. As a result, he reincarnated into a deer after death. Whatever one thinks about right before death with attachment, one may become that in the next life. So he became a deer soon afterwards. This was very sad. As a cultivator, he cultivated quite well, but was ruined in a short period of time." ("Teaching the Fa at the Houston Fa Conference" unofficial translation)
A cultivator cannot reach beyond the Three Realms without letting go of the qing in the Three Realms. In the end, all their effort would be ruined. How regretful!
Why is it so hard to let of qing? Because before we were even born, we had already been immersed in it. Notions formed before and after birth are made stronger and more magnified by qing. Human beings then use their notions to make judgments: this is good and that is not good. All human being should accomplish "the value of life": one should become outstanding, bring honor to the ancestors, keep up traditions, be successful, win recognition in society, and so on - all kinds of notions about how to live one's life.
Falun Dafa practitioners started off as ordinary human beings and gradually became cultivators. One's human notions were thus brought into cultivation. In the process of true cultivation, one should gradually become more clear-headed and discern one's true nature from the postnatal notions and let one's true self guide one's every thought and action. A cultivator should not let the postnatal and low-level notions affect his or her mind, change his or her path of cultivation, or even result in the abandonment of the opportunity to cultivate.
Human notions are deeply ingrained, and when they surface, cultivators might not notice them. For example, I am a young man in my 30s. I obtained a graduate degree outside China. My family members and relatives all expect me to become successful and have a happy marriage soon. But the reality is, I am in and out of jobs and doing poor financially. The Dafa project I am busy working on is a special working environment, and I have little contact with other people - you can say I am more isolated than monks in the temples. As a result, a marriage is a million miles away from me. When my family members urge me to get married, I can only "deal with" them or give them my "promise." Sometimes when I am less busy with Dafa work, and I cannot calm down to study the Fa, then human mentalities surface: am I forcing myself to suffer too much (in fact, suffering is good for a cultivator; only when one is not diligent does he or she feel painful)? When will this busy work end? Other people have jobs and houses, or at least are accompanied by a spouse and kids. Maybe I should think more about myself. Dafa work is shared by many practitioners, so I can do less or even none, then I will have the time to "struggle and compete" in the ordinary people's society. I even think about going back to China to change my "difficult situation," perhaps becoming a professor and start a family like my college classmates.
At times like this, I cannot study the Fa with a calm mind. Although I am reading the Fa, my mind is thinking about things I mentioned above. After "reading" like this for an hour, I feel like I have not read anything. I have also slacked off on the morning practice: a lot of times I practice only once a week because I sleep through the morning. Once I get up, I start to work on my computer. Day after day, Dafa work feels like ordinary people's work; studying the Fa has become a routine; practicing the exercise is "optional"; cultivating my heart has become an issue I "have no time to think about." For a long period of time, my xinxing has not improved - I have not looked inward, with the excuse of having no time. Conflicts with fellow practitioners increased, and I have been pushing problems out, holding on to my own views and not tolerating or forgiving others. When a problem arises, I try to push the responsibility to other people. I only like to do the work I am already familiar with, enjoying the current situation and even feeling complacent. Over a long period of time, I did a lot of work; yet I have also created quite a few problems and forms of interference - my notions and human attachments, which should have been eliminated long ago, have become a real obstacle to the Dafa projects.
Why am I often interfered by these notions and become despondent?
I think it is because I have not seen through the "good life" that ordinary people talk about. Although I can take fame and personal interest lightly, deeper in my mind, I still have a bit of attachment to "success," thinking it is meaningful and thus worth pursuing. When the persecution situation was severe and the work to validate Dafa was urgent, this attachment was temporarily suppressed. Although at such times, even when I was busy with Dafa work, I was in a despondent state, not a diligent one, because I had not truly removed my human attachments. Currently, the Fa-rectification situation has changed dramatically, and the condition in every aspect has relatively improved. Under the circumstance when Dafa work is not as urgent, my human attachments have re-surfaced.
However, these notions of living a good life and realizing one's value are not one's true thought. Instead, they are an accumulation of postnatal notions that restrain people, making people think that only by leading such a life can one achieve a valuable life. I think this notion was also arranged by the old forces for people, and even practitioners. It is a lock, a tribulation on a practitioner's path to godhood. If I am attached to it and cannot let go, then I am not able to break away from being human. I would keep myself busy to achieve "the good life," or even live my life for it. In the end, I would find all of this is empty: what difference will it make if I were the highest-ranking official or had all the money in the world? Only cultivation and returning to one's true self is real - it is our true mission for coming to this human world.
When a cultivator melts into the Fa, he or she can see through all this and rise above and beyond the notions. This does not mean he or she gives up his or her job and normal life in society. He or she could be very affluent without being attaching to it. A job and life in ordinary human society are not only means to make a living, but also opportunities of validating Dafa and saving sentient beings. When I do my job well, naturally I will get a good salary or even a promotion; they are not results of "struggles and competition" with attachments. I should treat my family members and other people with compassion without being attached to validating myself. Everything comes to me following predestined relationships, and everything I do is for saving sentient beings. I will take the losses and gains of this world lightly and not feel painful about them: a cultivator takes suffering as joy. In fact, being lost in the delusions of qing and spending one's whole life busy pursuing, without being able to rise above and beyond it, is true suffering.
Realizing the problem is only the first step of improvement. To me, being diligent is being able to use righteous thoughts when validating Dafa to guide my every thought and action. This can only come from studying the Fa and cultivating my heart. Melt into the Fa, rationally validate Dafa and save sentient beings without being interfered with by human notions and sentiments - this is what Teacher wants to see the most.
